Hannah Louise Swift

Yip, i’m back on the market! So no need for these anymore…

I am accepting offers for dates or blind dates. Feel free to comment here…

Coming home with 34 insect bites, planeflu and mild sun burn, it really is no wonder I wasn’t my usual self this time around. When you have itches and bites like mine were, it’s hard to concentrate on anything but how nice it would be to itch yourself into an itching stupor! So apologies to all of you who suffered my wrath, i’m still itchiung now if it makes you feel better! It was once again an incredible trip and even further cemented my desire to emmigrate over there and live out my days in factor 50+ suncream! So a huge thanks to AF, the boss man and the other 53 people for making it possible and such a hoot. Here are my top 5′s and a longer version for all you insomniacs out there!

Top 5 moments
1) The Night Dive
2) The Other Dives
3) The Snorkelling
4) Sat on the front of the Catamaran
5) The rumball rally, I managed not to kill people with my driving, tried my best like!
(6) I became an aunty too! )

Top 5 worst moments
1) The bites
2) The jellyfish stings (no i did not get peed on)
3) The sun burn
4) The planeflu
5) The street meat poisoning

THE LONG VERSION
Warning – Only read on if you are struggling to sleep!

For some time now I have been wanting to write about why Barbados means so much to me, and to many others. I have wanted to put it down in words since I got back last year, so here goes…
I have kinda touched on it before but 13 months ago i was fed up. I was in a job I hated, facing people who just didnt get affiliate marketing. Then out of the blue a very nice man known by the name of Chris Clarkson put a spare Barbados ticket on the forum. I thought feck it, I’m gonna have a go for that. I started a whole campaign of various reasons why I felt I should go, stayed up all night, waited and eventually got the msn message! Hurrah! i had 2 days to pack!

So, I got on the plane with Nim Nim and Frostie and still couldn’t fathom what was going on. Getting off that plane and realising that actually yes, I was there was a moment I will never forget, along with nearly being thrown straight back off again for taking pictures of the plane!

Anyway, I digress. That week of drinking, more drinking and just a little bit more drinking taught me a few lessons about the world we work and live in. Making such good friends in affiliate marketing helped me understand that it was what I did to help them that fed them. There I was with a fixed income, nothing to worry about, yet some affiliates do not know what they will earn one month from the next (granted most earn more in a month, than I in a year, but still) So, I changed my work ethic and realeased that without meeting these people and understanding their wants and needs as individuals but more importantly as human beings not websites then I would never get on in my job.

Not long after I moved jobs and location and now I’m as happy as larry.

On a less work related note, my very first experience of scuba diving was in Barbados with the friendly guys at eco dive. Needless to say I have been hooked on it ever since! I got my PADI qualification with In Deep in October and due to the weather have not managed to dive that much. So as soon as I woke on the first morning this year, on went the fins mask and snorkel and off I went to get my sea legs back. I faced a few battles with some btard jellyfish, but saw some incredible sites including my very first turtle of the year. I was chuffed to bits to get a couple of really good dives in on one day, the first with the newbee’s the second with just a few of us and boy did we see some sites! You name it we saw it. This year we dived with guys at Roger’s Scuba Shack! They were awesome! Myself, Alex and Mark (from the shack) went on a night dive too!

I will be honest i was crapping myself as the sun went down and everything became pitch black! just the three of us underwater with torches facing the depths and the unknown, it was like the’famous five’ or something. We went round a wreck and over some reefs and all the scary shit came out. Crazy crabs (they were shagging) some funky lobsters, phosphorescence and various fishies and a mahoosive tentacle of an octapus that had just devoured 4 or 5 conches! fat btard!

Obviously the diving was the highlight of the week, that and catching up with the 10 other people who went last year, and the 44 who were stuck on an island with me, and they could not escape! mwah ha ha!

I have rambled for far too long now and most if it probably isnt even in English! The main point is that Barbados is far from just a holiday, it can be a life changing experience, where you will do things you may not do again and will meet friends who will stay your friends for a long time to come! You’ll also do some business! tee hee, should mention that part!

I will shut up now, as I am already banned from saying *Barbados* in the office, in fact every time I do – people ‘ding me’

Thanks again all!

Ragga Ragga

Boobs x

Typical, I bought a card, only to see Happy Father’s Day on the inside. So Daddy dearest here is a virtual card immortalised on my blog!

Happy Birthday! Love you lots! Hannah and Monkey! xxx

Wow. It’s a whole two days later and I still haven’t quite realised what happened, or rather it just hasn’t sunk in yet! I cannot believe I won the award. I’m sitting here trying to write this blog post and I can’t quite put my feelings into words. I had convinced myself prior to the awards that someone else was going to win and I was so chuffed for that person as I really felt they deserved it, so to get more votes than them and the others in my category is truly astounding! *shakes head in utter disbelief*

I didn’t plan a thankyou/acceptance speach so here goes (insert Gwyneth Paltrow tear here);

I have to thank Mark and Bruce – for giving me the opportunity of a lifetime when they offered me my job and for putting up with me on a daily basis!
Chris Clarkson – for sending me to Barbados, without which I would never have stayed in this industry.
Joe Connor – for talking to me about the industry and persuading me it was full of decent people after all. See previous post on subject here.
Lee McCoy, Tom Quinn and Naomi Brown – for giving me life long ‘Team Fun’ friendships and for all the advice through the past year
Keith Bond and Martin Warn – for just being nice genuine guys and keeping me awake at 2am when struggling with html!
Karel Ellis-Gray and Red Barrington – for being my laughter providers through the day and being two of my closest mates
Darren Newmark – for just being Darren
Kirsty – for not being as scary as I thought when first meeting her, she was my idol (almost asked for her autograph) and for providing amusing spider stories.
Jason and Jude – Get a room, thanks for amusing me on twitter!
Julie H – ohh the stories! thanks for the rum! and keeping the champers cold in the bidet!
Jason and John - for being hilarious piss takers – yes, i ‘misplaced’ my car
All my clients – for just being good sports!
Jay – for being rubbish at your job so i got given it
J Lil and the AF guys – for giving me drunken moments and letting me go back to Barbados
The Network Staff – for dealing with my frequent stupid questions
Frank and Gem – for being the nicest most loved up people i know
Matt Rand – for learning the trade with me, study buddies!
My friends and family – for bless their hearts trying to understand what I do for a living!
The Bristol lot - for letting me feel their baby bumps, sending me jokes and singing Wurzels songs with me and for playing fun fun fun when i collected my award
George – for breif yet insightful discussions on affy marketing and for being such a gentleman.
Max, Neil, Dom, Frostie, Kieron, Elaine, Dave, Dan (discount shopping – forgot your last name!) Dirk, Jesse, Neil M, James A, Zak and Graham, Clarke, Shane, Ray, Natty, Di, Ian, Mark and Julie Pearson, Mikeeeyyyy for being inspirational, role models, laughter provokers and good people. (I know I forgot people, but it’s late!)

Most of all to all of you who took the time to vote for me, I cannot thank you enough, it means so much that I was shaking on stage with tears in my eyes. I am humbled and honoured to receive an award like this. It means all the late nights, bags under my ears and moments of pulling my hair out were noticed! lol

Those of you who know me know that I am very shy really and very self critical, so I am still not convinced I should of won, but I truly thank you from the bottom of my heart, it means so much. Annnnnnnd, I get a new shiny thing for my desk and got to meet Jason Manford!!! whoop!

oh and Phil, coz he told me too

It is hard for me to believe that in October 2007 (just over 18 months ago) I didn’t know what an affiliate was, or what they did. Now I have been nominated for an award for my work in the affiliate community. It is tremendously hard for me to fathom. I guess before I go into my thankyou’s I should explain just what a personal acheivement this is for me.

It’s mid October 2007 and my current manager and boss in passing conversation say “We’ve decided you will be looking after our affiliates and white labels” – Affili-what??? The current affiliate manager, a dear friend of mine had lost interest (which he will admit) and they saw my skills coming from a sales background and my flair for talking to anyone and they put the two together.
I’ll be honest, I resented them incredibly for not even asking if I wanted the job, just thrusting it upon me. I had just left a well paid sales job and had moved from Twickenham to Watford for this one. I wanted to do core marketing, writing was what I loved so I was angry about being forced into affiliate management. Anyway, I battled on and learned the trade but faced ‘no’ at every corner. Eventually I began to understand the needs of an affiliate and how they worked and grasped the concept of cookies and tracking and the odd voucher code. Then came the time when how a feed worked really sank in! I even managed to launch the programme onto a second network!
By the spring of 2008 I was getting really really fed up of working for the company, fed up of the corporate policies and waiting months for an answer, sick of people not understanding my job and not understanding the power of an affiliate. I was ready to give in and go back to sales or another form of marketing. Then came the best news… After reading on the forum that there was a last minute place to Barbados with Affiliate Future I put my heart and soul into winning a place, I begged, humiliated myself and stayed up all night with my laptop just incase someone elses entry was better than mine. I won a ticket!!! (Thanks Sunshine.co.uk!)
Barbados was my first affiliate event, so boy was I nervous! I met some of the nicest, hard working amazing people on that trip who not only proved that yes, afterall affiliates ARE human beings, and where I had a secure salary, they didn’t. I had a few very in depth conversations with people and it was then that I realised I loved the industry, loved the people, but did not love my current company!
Returning to the UK and back into the swing of things I began looking for a new job, and tried to get to as many get togethers as possible. A chance meeting at a get together and I met Mark.

“you’ll give me a job” said a drunken Hannah… A few weeks later and another get together and again “You said you would give me a job” eventually Mark caved and said maybe. I had an interview in the late July where I met Mark and Bruce, we shook hands over a few glasses of wine and a kebab, and in the Septemeber I made the move to Plymouth.
Having never been to Plymouth before I was understandably nervous, but Mark and Lorraine and Martin soon made me feel at home, and of course I brought Monkey the cat!
Mark spent alot of time training me in the finer arts of Affiliate Marketing whilst Bruce worked from Milton Keynes teaching me the finer arts of big words and increased my vocabulary! It has been great to spend the last 9 months working with such passionate, devoted industry figures who both in their own rights deserve awards, if only just for putting up with me for such a long time! I think we make a brilliant team, constantly throwing ideas around, teaching each other tricks of the trade and most importantly we have fun and love what we do.

So I guess what I am trying to explain is that the past 18 months have been a steep learning curve, and I have gone from someone who hated all things affiliate to someone who loves affiliate marketing, I dream about it, talk about it constantly and spend my life online. I know it sounds sad, but my closest friends are in the industry, my role models are in the industry and the people learn from are in it too. It isn’t just a job to me, it is a lifestyle. I think those of you in our ‘community’ will feel the same way as I do.

Being nominated for ‘Account Manager of the Year’ came as a shock I have to say, although some people had kindly said they would nominate me, I felt that there were more deserving people in the industry, and let’s face it there are 34,493 members of the forum (at the time of typing this) so just a few people is a small snippet of all those eligable to nominate. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, trust me if there was a way of me finding out who nominated me I would thank you all individually. As it is I am having to blog about it! I wish I could thank everyone individually on here but so many of you have contributed to me either as a friend, with advice and tips or just a good gossip that I would be here all day saying thanks to you all! I guess thanks mainly to all you affiliates, Mark and Bruce for taking a chance on me, the Network staff and my lovely clients!

Thankyou, with all my heart thankyou all for the nominations, the support, the jokes and the friendships. It means the world to me. There are some great contenders in my category who are all more than deserving of the award so good luck to you all.

I hope to see you all at the awards ceremony for a drink or several. Oh, and can someone stop me flirting with Jason Manford, he is quite beautiful!

Hannah xxx

Oh if you do want to vote for me (so I can meet Jason in real life) click here.

Or if you want to vote Existem Affiliate Management for Agency of The Year click here.